Monday, August 15, 2011

Mars and Venus

This morning I realized, yet again, how different my husband and I are. After beating myself up for weeks  about my weight gain and struggling to get to the gym without disrupting my children's schedules or making them stay at the gym nursery too long, I decided to get up at the ass crack of dawn and go with Brad. Good idea. Good bonding. Good quality one-on-one time with my husband. In theory.

When I go to the gym, I put my headphones in, crank my music, and avoid eye contact and conversation. I am not a snob; I am just focused on doing what I have to do and getting the heck out of there. Occasionally I go with a girlfriend, and we work out and talk; then, it's more like a playdate. But when I don't go with her, I don't socialize. Until this morning.

"How's the weight?" "What do you think of this exercise?" "Is something wrong?" "You're awfully quiet; what's the matter?" "Are you sure that weight's good?" "I think that's too light for you; you need a heavier weight." OMG, enough all ready! I love you with all my heart, but seriously, it's 5:30 a.m.--SHUT UP!

Then there's the lollygagging. I do a set, breathe, do another set, breathe, do another set, and move rapidly onto the next machine. Brad does a set, wanders around in circles, checks himself out in the mirror, gets a drink of water, asks me fifteen questions, talks to a few other gym goers, checks himself out again...you get the idea.

We've long known that Brad is a morning person, and I am a person who should not even have human contact until after 9 a.m. and/or 3 cups of coffee. He wakes up like a Jack Russell terrier, all bouncy and happy and tongue-waggy. I wake up like a bear whose hibernation was disrupted by a Jack Russell terrier's incessant barking.

But, it works. We work. Most of the time, except at the gym apparently, I love that we are so different. I love that we can sometimes irritate the hell out of each other and still be each other's person. I love that he texts me in the morning just to say, "How is your morning going?" I love that he wants to help me lose my extra weight (even though he likes it) just because he knows I'm not comfortable with my body. And after a weekend of college visits and preparing to let our first baby leave the nest, I love that I know we will be okay once the kids grow up and move away. Most of all, I love that I get to spend my life with my best friend.

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